Please listen to this wonderful two-hour interview with Kristen Caven about bullying from a spiritual perspective. Paula Thompson, Andre Radatus, and Christilyn Biek-Larson, the hosts of Cosmic Citizen Radio provide space and time for a wide-ranging conversation about every angle of this social problem.
It is a two-hour interview, but if you would like to drop in and listen for a few minutes, here is a guide to the key moments:
- 5:30 Interview begins
- 6:45 Kristen explains why bullying is NOT a subject near and dear to her heart.
- 10:00 What The Bullying Antidote is and how the book is structured – 3 parts
- 11:30 What bullying is and how we can understand it: bullying defined, the bullying dynamic.
- 14:50 Zorgos!
- 17:30 Racism, Terrorism… how we justify bullying with fear and confusion.
- 18:45 What’s in the news: “average citizen” shooter in Chattanooga has an abusive family; random racial beating by college students; Boko Haram uses child bombers; what bullying turns into.
- 22:00 What do we tolerate and what do we nurture? How the extreme fundamentalist, autocratic parenting style has swung to permissive style. Cultural support for and normalcy of bullying.
- 25:00 Three mainstream parenting practices that unknowingly nurture bullying dynamics.
- 27:30 ACES study
- 30:00 Long-term research on punishment in Sweden – the story of how one country changed its story, and how the US rates in UNICEF study.
- 34:00 Brain Science – we are wired for negativity and need to consciously work on positivity
- 35:00 No-spank laws and the Declaration on the Rights of the Child
- 39:00 How the US ranks nationally for childhood wellness
- 41:30 The great work being done in the US, in schools, to diminish bullying
- 43:45 Pre-school is key to protecting society from bullying & crime
- 44:30 How cooperative preschools create good culture; what to look for in schools in terms of bullying
- 47:00 <an enthusiastic plug for Pixar’s Inside Out!>
- 48:00 My Vision for World Domination…?
- 50:00 (How this book can help heal adult love relationships as well!)
- 53:00 Bullying is being mean! If we are compassionate to ourselves, we won’t hurt others/our kids.
- 54:00 Gandalf’s intention: “You! Shall! Not! Pass!” Great example of how to stand up against bullies.
- 56:00 How Paula’s daughter was bullied (note about handout at bottom of this page: https://zorgos.wordpress.com/discussion/)
- 1:03 Kristen’s response…pecking orders… when bullying begins… how schools respond…what bullying isn’t…testing…
- 1:08:30 How Kristen was a bully, and what her teacher did.
- 1:09:30 Christilyn on Halt and Catch Fire “faggot” locker scene – how sexual difference is a “protected” area for bullies
- 1:13 Kristen compares culture of gay bullying before legal Gay Marriage struggle to Nazi and Slavery propaganda that made killing Jews, enslaving blacks culturally/economically correct. Bringing injustice to light eliminates systemic discrimination.
- 1:16 good school rules – respect, no labeling
- 1:18 Dennis Leary quote: “My kid hates one thing: naps.” How racism and hatred are perpetuated.
- 1:19:45 Chrystilin on how teaching kids how to be obedient teaches them to accept social bullying
- 1:20:30 Fight, Flight, or Freeze question
- 1:21: Nazi generation victims of terrible parenting in Weimar Republic – children as “poison containers” – this mindset happening now. How a child’s brain chooses whether to develop survival- or growth- oriented neurons. Feminine perspective is “tend and befriend.” Kids learn there are other options to conflict.
- 1:28:30 The power of upstanders! Great stories about people with Zorgos who say “knock it off.” (bully guards, mean stinks, pink shirt day)
- 1:34 How one parent turned her child bully’s life around
- 1:36 Caller: a schoolteacher who sees systemic bullying. Thoughts on anti-bullying policies.
- 1:42 How to look at school bullying programs & policies
- 1:46 (shout-out to Oakland), and the importance of parents in supporting schools
- 1:50:30 Bullying is a human rights issue.
- 1:52:30 Don’t read The Bullying Antidote alone! The work of changing a culture cannot be done alone.
- 1:53 Quick look at Part 3 of the book – things you can learn.
- 1:57 parents are more powerful than we know! Parents could turn bullying around in one generation by teaching our kids Zorgos!